various & sundry

something’s gotta give

Have you ever had that feeling of complete and total nausea and sickness when you wake up in the morning and you realize what lies ahead of you? How it feels impossible to get out of bed and start another day, knowing what you’re about to face?

I think I’m at that point and I know I’ve got to do something about it. I am doing something about it, sort of. I have started to take steps to change my future, but I know it’s not going to be instant, so I have to try and find some patience, when I am normally a very impatient person.

Every/any other time I have been in this state I knew it was time to make changes or I’d drown. I’ve always been someone whose gut feeling is spot on 100% of the time. I have to stop for a moment and find a quiet space in my overactive brain to listen though.

Sometimes it’s hard to hear through all the white noise.

But if I stay deaf to it too long my body suffers.

So, I am taking some very BIG baby steps and although I am terrified by the idea, I am also excited to try and make something new for myself.

There comes a point where you just have to say “the heck with this shit” and just focus on what you need to keep yourself alive.

My soul has been suffering for a little too long and I’m finally listening. Time to mend the broken spirit and start to heal.

If you need me, I’ll be searching for my Muse. She left a long time ago and I miss her terribly.

5 Comments

  • sars

    I’d suggest looking under the sofa.

    My parents have a chihuahua named Muse. She often hides, and that’s her favourite spot. Sorry, little aside…

  • Emsxiety

    I do not like change, except for hair coloring. Sometimes change is very necessary and needed. Still don’t like it, but usually it’s for the better even though I hate to admit that. Oh speaking of hair, I blame Sassymonkey but now I must go dye my hair.

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