the anomaly that is me

you know, THAT kind of morning

I slept hard last night. I normally don’t sleep well at all. I get up multiple times in the night. But last night I got up once, to go to the bathroom, and then I was dead to the world again.

I only know this because I generally wake up within the first 5 minutes of my wake-up light lighting up. It starts to brighten the room 20 minutes before the “alarm” goes off (in this case, gentle piano music. I could do chirping birds, but that makes me anxious). It was two minutes to 7am when I semi-realized that the room might be lighter. AND the sun was out this morning, too. And when the piano started I had no idea what was going on.

It took forever for my eyes to want to open. I was still in bed, trying to shake the sleep from my brain, 10 minutes after the alarm went off. I just couldn’t wake up. I wasn’t the only one, I had to call Shawn’s name since he was sleeping through the alarm, too.

Yoshi stood up (on the bed) before we did. Then plopped himself back down on top of me. Probably thinking we were going to spend the day in bed together.

Everybody need a bosom for a pillow, MummyHooman. Your’s is just right.

I stumbled around once out of bed. Trying to figure out how clothes worked. Seriously. I felt like I should have won an award just for figuring out how to put my underwear on this morning. Getting my legs through the holes in the undies was a miraculous feat. Undies are complicated.

So is standing upright.

Turns out, I am not wearing the pants I thought I put on this morning. I realized this on my walk to the bus stop and they started falling down. I am wearing a pair of jeans that I need to use a belt for. I do not have a belt with me. By that time, I was already bundled in my OMG IT’S BLOODY FREEZING outdoor attire, and I was trying to make the bus. There was no going back.

So I had to walk to work holding my pants up, through my coat. That’s, like, having your hands in your coat pockets, but also grabbing the top of your pants through the inside of the pockets, so they don’t fall to the ground and trip you, and allowing you to get frostbite on your patootie.

I knew I was stopping at Starbucks across from work, and I am so happy that the friend that now works there has seen me during regular awake hours, and this morning’s failure of trying to order stuff wasn’t her first impression of me. She’d probably think I was extremely dim. I had to put money on my starbucks card, and order a coffee, buy some food and OJ. It was confusing (to me). I had no idea what the heck was going on. Em might have managed to steal money from my bank account this morning, how out of it I was. I’m surprised I didn’t just hand her my debit card and bank PIN. Oy.

I also realized as I sat down at my desk, ready to check email, that I didn’t wear my necklace today. This is akin to forgetting to wear your watch, when you wear one all of the time. I feel naked (and, quite possibly could be at some point, when my pants finally fall down) and it’s throwing me off my game (even more-so than just my foggy, still asleep brain state).

I have already downed an orange juice, green apple, cheese, almonds and cranberries. I am almost finished with my coffee. I am in this weird foggy, spacey, state. I’m not sure when my brain will finally wake up.

It’s going to be an interesting day in the office, that’s for sure.

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