blah, blah, blah, more stuff happens & we don't get a break

Dear Universe,I'd really like a break about now. A break from all the suck you keep throwing at us in this house. I am tired. I am overwhelmed. I am having panic attacks and my food isn't digesting. I am over all of the suck and I am losing whatever hold on staying positive that I have. That hold is getting slippery and thin.There's a lot of stuff I don't talk about on here lately because it's not really public knowledge, but it's the base for all of the suck that keeps adding to it and it's getting more and more difficult to stay afloat.I'm still not over Annie. Not that I expected to be, but it's getting harder for me rather than easier. I don't think I took enough time off work or whatever. Or really grieved for her properly. My sadness was lightened when the worrying about how she was doing lifted. I think that tricked my brain into thinking I was over being sad. I'm not. And it hits me at the oddest times and I don't like it. And I keep coming back to the part when they told me how much it was and I had this mini panic attack over the fact that I could not even afford to put my dog down. Doing that was going to seriously damage our meager finances. I couldn't let myself think about it as I handed over my credit card and pretended that wasn't happening. I wanted to give my Annabelly some peace, this wasn't the time to break down over money.And then yesterday we looked out our window and noticed that the back tire of the car was completely flat. Joy. It was pouring rain on top of ice and Shawn went out and lay down in a puddle, being rained on, changed the flat for the teeny tiny spare we have in the car and we thought about what to do. If we have to buy a tire, we're screwed. We're hoping our tire can just be patched which is much, much cheaper. There was a 5 hour wait at the shop yesterday so they gave us an appointment for this morning. Yesterday's 24 hours of rain has turned into 36 hours of snow, so we've got to get there safely with a dinghy tire on in a storm. Woo.There are other things piled on top of piles and I just can't take it anymore. Something good has to happen soon or I think I might just fall apart.Yes, this isn't a happy post. I can't bring myself to do happy right now. What I needed was an outlet for the unhappy. Maybe this will clear some room for sunshine and rainbows. I don't know. I hope so anyhow.